Non binary

I cry myself

Portfolio Priest

And, as I live with this

self proclaimed handle,

I realise

it comes from all those years

I was told

You have to choose

You have to be one thing 

or the other 

Those years when my vocation

was questioned

by a patriarchy

that knew not how

to re-imagine priesthood

A patriarchy that sought to weed out

and punish by exclusion 

all who were different

And I know now

as I knew then

My vocation is non binary

not this or that

but a kaleidoscope of bits and pieces

of many shapes and hues

tumbling together

And I recognise

my privilege

that allows me to claim my identity

An identity that embraces the possibility

of more than one thing being true

at the same time

and to call it fabulous

Follow me

Matthew 9:9

As Jesus was walking along, he saw a man called Matthew sitting at the tax booth; and he said to him, “Follow me.” And he got up and followed him.

In 2017, I reflected on the transition out of parish ministry into a national role in mission and pioneering in the Church of Scotland. A transition that involved navigating loss of role, loss of home and loss of faith community.

What I didn’t realise then is that that would also lead to a move out of the denomination in which I’d served as an ordained minister for over twenty five years.

That move began with being restored and renewed in faith by being enveloped in the liturgy of the Scottish Episcopal Church and the tenacious love of God.

This week, I had cause to reflect further on where that adventure has led so far. Having transferred orders and being ordained episcopally in the SEC, ministry, for me, now involves offering pastoral supervision and retreats alongside working with those in formation for ministry in the SEC and, next week, I’ll be licensed as priest in charge in the community I’ve been serving for the last three years. All of these, together, nurture and sustain joy in service. I’m incredibly grateful for the recognition of and the opportunity to exercise gifts that don’t fit into a prescribed role or model of ordained ministry. 

Jesus’ call to ministry was never without risk or without loss. Still, it is a dynamic summons to bear the light of Hope into every darkness. Ministry today calls for the ability to be nimble, to follow a God who doesn’t stand still or conform to our preferences but who calls us out of our structures - whatever they be - to follow God wherever God is already at work.

And, as soon as we turn to follow God, we find God following us in a divine dance in which we are invited to participate in ever widening circles.

Following the God who follows us all through life.