There are times when confrontation will not, in fact, do much good other than to highlight bad behaviour and make one feel courageous for having named the elephant in the room. The actual behaviour may not change but, rather, become more entrenched in response to challenge. Energy expended may not produce the desired effect. Sometimes there is a way of circumnavigating problems that might be more effective and mean that folk are not alienated or become defensive. Of course those who can name the conflict will often be disappointed if it is not confronted and resolved, if perpetrators are not called out to change. I am learning to live with being a disappointment. The Kingdom is full of them. How often did Jesus disappoint the folk around him, not because he was afraid of conflict, far from it, but because he found another way, the way of love?