journalling

A slow burn for re-entry

2012-02-17T16:24:00.000Z

The ship docks as the sun rises over Progresso in Mexico. It is a quiet ship at that time of the morning, just a few folk on the running track. The air is still, balmy, warm. A lovely time for reflection. One of the aims of this Continuing Ed is to write worship material for the season after Pentecost, so my head is filled with the texts, from Mark and John and, looking forward to the day ahead, the possibilities seem endless in this place where it is possible to be still and quiet, a place where the heat of the morning caresses and cajoles body, mind and spirit into wakefulness - far removed from the harsh Scottish winter left behind for a time. It is easy to imagine that, in such a climate, writing would be easier, creativity would be heightened but the reality is that we settle into whatever environment is our norm. We adapt, become restless and even yearn for the other, for the unknown. Such is our fickleness.
It was good and right and refreshing to be with the Revgals, constructing worship, enjoying fellowship, making connections, renewing friendships,creating networks, but what is life giving and life enhancing is when that experience pervades the routine of everyday back home in the grey dreichness of a Scottish winter as it percolates into springtime, whispering a reminder of newness and life, breathing the warmth of love shared and, preferably at inopportune moments, echoing the tinkling laughter shared with female colleagues who simply "get it". Such moments, such journeys shared, bring energy that enable survival in a harsher climate, a harshness created not just by the weather but by the calling to serve God in male dominated institutions in which the wiles of the Spirit are seldom given free rein for fear of upsetting order and propriety and in which the complementarity of" male and female as God created them" is seldom envisaged as a good thing but as a distraction from the real work of God. It takes a lot of energy to continue to be creative and inspired in such a climate, so, when the opportunity is available, one must enjoy the solidarity and drink deep from the well of affirmation. That time of building up has to be eked out, not rationed, but able to sustain for some time to come. So, as I leave behind my time of study leave and engage in the parish as we hurtle into Lent, I am giving thanks. Giving thanks, above all, for colleagues, male and female, who "get it". Giving thanks, right now for Revgals and Big Events!

Universal language

2012-02-12T21:05:00.000Z

On every corner, it seemed, was another band, jamming for tips - just part of the magic of New Orleans. Just part of the magic of a people and a culture that understands the universality of music, a language that, with or without words, speaks volumes and crosses boundaries. And, in this city of resilience and tenacity, the music symbolises the heart of the people - embracing, hospitable, buoyant, unable to be quelled by external force, even the powerful forces of nature. A heart that reaches out and breathes an energetic beauty into living. A heart that exudes hope.
Wouldn't it be wonderful if such music and all to which it testifies were recognisable in the language of faith?
Three things last forever, faith, hope and love. And the greatest of these is love.
(1Corinthians 13)

Bridge builders

2012-02-06T22:51:00.000Z

The sun rose over this bridge in New Orleans, signaling that it was time to leave the cruise ship aboard which we had been engaged in some Continuing Education with a bunch of clergy women and friends. The women came from many different places, from many different denominations, with many different degrees of experience and wisdom. Infectious exuberance lay alongside careworn weariness. Tired spirits were buoyed up by unbridled optimism. Those just embarking on ministry rubbed along with those already retired. Each brought enough to share and more and all feasted on a rich smorgasbord of imagination and creativity. There was respectful listening and careful holding of confidences shared. This reflects the roots of the group - a supportive online web ring for women in ministry - and their friends. That so many shades of theology and opinion and character and strength can meet and feel valued and heard is no mean feat. Engineered by the God of all life - with a little (lot of) help from the board of the Revgalblogpals. Thanks be to God.

The Gathering

2012-01-28T14:00:00.000Z

The more "formal" educational part of this trip begins today when we meet up with some of the other Revgals - for some continuing Ed with Jenee Woodward of Textweek. From facebook, we have gleaned that a lot of them are already here, having flown in to New Orleans yesterday. It is strange to think that we might bump into them on the street - there is a sense of forces "gathering". And, of course there are many whom we have never met before and would not recognise even if we did meet before we are together on the ship.
And so we move on today, (as we do every day, but rarely acknowledge) to new opportunities, to new relationships, to new learning, with a great sense of trepidation and anticipation. And, of course, with the assurance that God is with us and goes before us. Thanks be to God.

Masked communication

2012-01-26T21:43:00.001Z

Far from home and unable to communicate with family by phone, it was suggested that we might be visible on a nearby webcam. So, donning Mardi Gras masks, my friend and I located the camera and hung around for a few minutes, not knowing whether or not we would be in the right place at the right time and be recognised. The wonderful thing is that schedules DID manage to collide and our families saw behind the masks. How exciting it was to discover that our attempt at communication had succeeded and how good it felt to have made our families smile.
God's schedule collides with ours every moment, unrecognised or not, and God's smile is never far away. We are beloved children of God, with or without our masks!

Day and Night

2012-01-26T03:16:00.001Z

It has been a day of contrasts:
We arrived in the French Quarter of New Orleans last night and, it would be fair to say, witnessed some of the seedier night life. The same area looked decidedly different in the daylight.
We met an American in shorts, playing Scotland the Brave on the bagpipes to celebrate Burns night.
And, we ate Gumbo and poboys instead of haggis, neeps and tatties.
Above all there is a wonderful slowing of pace - necessary for winding down and finding a new energy for creativity.
It has also been an emotional day, a letting go of many of the burdens that we tend to carry for others as well as an incredible awareness of the nearness of the spirit of loved ones for whom the experiences I am enjoying right now were never an option.
Exhausting, exhilarating, stimulating, invigorating - a day of contrasts indeed.

Out of the box

2012-01-23T22:54:00.001Z

Off on study leave - meeting up with some amazing RevGals and, hopefully, writing some worship material - as well as networking, planking, Kindling... Often, in the lead up to time away, there comes a point when I start to wonder: Is all the hassle of sorting things out and organising things so that I can be away worth the effort? But the knowledge that I'll return refreshed physically and spiritually dictates that it is more than worth it.
The study is deliberately timed so that we can all be back in our parishes in time for the start of the season of Lent and the journey to Easter, a time when there is so much scope for Creativity in the church. So, a full tank is required. Looking forward to topping up over these next couple of weeks.

Spirit of Adventure

2012-01-19T23:27:00.000Z

As a new colleague was ordained to ministry of word and sacrament tonight, there was a real sense of anticipation and excitement. Who knows what the future will bring or where the journey will lead? As I reflected on the joy of beginnings, I was also giving thanks for that stage on the journey that is not just as scary but is still a challenge. That stage where the terrain is slightly more familiar yet also full of surprises. And, as we traverse familiar paths and embrace new horizons, we are carried aloft by the unpredictable Spirit of God, blowing where she will, creating mischief, encouraging playfulness, remaining dependable in every changing landscape. Thanks be to God.

In the gloaming...

2012-01-18T18:44:00.000Z

The cows stand in the gloaming

unconcerned about the scudding clouds

enjoying the moment

as the sky turns purple

and the noise of the day recedes.

That liminal time

as afternoon bleeds into evening

a time to draw breath,

to pause and reflect -

a threshold of opportunity

to be seized or lost forever.

Silhouetted for a moment

before darkness descends

and shapes become indistinguishable

blending back in

to the pastoral landscape

becoming unremarkable once more.

To grasp that moment of definition

is to be struck with the timing of God

in tune with the creator

who, in every moment,

provides beauty

continually painting new landscapes

enjoying the task so much

that it matters not

whether anyone notices

Such fulfillment is internal

and not dependent

on others' approval -

and that is real freedom.

Perspective

2012-01-14T23:35:00.000Z

Tomorrow, in church, we'll be thinking about Jesus encouraging people to look at things differently and calling some unlikely people to "Come and see". Philip and Nathanael responded to that summons and their lives were changed for ever.
(John 1:43-51)

I've altered some of the images with which folk are familiar around the church to see if they still recognise them. The image above is a detail of the cross that sits on top of the church tower, a modern (50s-60s) interpretation of the crown of thorns.

Stepping back and taking a fresh look at life and at faith may lead to us being surprised and enriched by a different view.

Leaving a trail

2012-01-11T22:44:00.000Z

One of the beaches we walked on Arran last week was littered with dead starfish. This seems to be a phenomenon that, according to google, is fairly common on beaches the world over, most likely caused, in this case, by recent severe storms.
They were very pretty but no less dead!
The sight led me to think about how nothing is without consequence - for good or ill. And some events set up amazing chain reactions that we would never envisage. While the philosophy of cause and effect can lead to deplorable evil, equally, something apparently insignificant can lead to untold good.
Or, as Jesus once said: Whoever gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones...
May we be encouraged to keep on performing unseen acts of kindness, trusting in disproportionate growth and the potential for good in the world.

Holding on

2012-01-06T22:24:00.000Z

20 years ago today, my father in law died after a long, wearying and debilitating sojourn with Parkinson's and Alzheimer's.
We'd intended to take down our Christmas tree that night, it being 12th night but, with everything being thrown into disarray, it was well into February before we got around to that. In the midst of grief it was comforting to have such a visible reminder of the Light that came into the world - Light that darkness has never overcome. The Incarnation cannot be packed away in the attic or in the cupboard under the stairs. Thanks be to God - it goes on making a difference in all of life - and death.

Seeing the light

2012-01-06T20:31:00.000Z

We can't be sure there were three of them

We can't be sure they were men

And they don't seem to have been particularly wise

stirring up a political storm

causing havoc in their wake

and untold grief

at the slaughter of innocents.

Condemning the Holy family

to life as refugees

their gift about which we rarely speak

choosing to focus instead

on the gold, frankincense and myrrh.

And yet perhaps that gift of flight

was as significant as any other

in determining the affinity

that God laid down

with suffering, oppressed humanity

unlocking the way

that all might see

that God was - and is

one of us.

Liz Crumlish Epiphany 2012

Home by another way

2012-01-02T21:52:00.000Z

A "wee walk" intended to slough off some of the excess of the season turned out to be a bit more than we'd anticipated. Not wanting to retrace our steps, we kept going until we found an alternative way back. However, the scenery and the bracing air made the tramp worthwhile.
New year seems like a good time to veer from the familiar, perhaps even tried and tested ways, to open ourselves to the possibility of exploring the new.
Faced with the luxury of such choice, it would be a shame to squander the opportunity.
May this new year be, for you, one of such opportunity and discovery and one in which you are open to and enriched by new experience.

Christmas continues

2011-12-29T23:45:00.000Z

The light shines in the darkness

and the darkness has not overcome it...

The Christ candle continues to burn -

it burns clear in all the demands of life

illuminating the possibility of rest

it burns true in days of confusion

pointing the way to clarity

it burns steadily when all is shifting

alluding to calm in the storm.

Every day becomes a holy day

Lit by God in our midst.

Incarnation - God is with us still

Because its Christmas...

2011-12-24T09:24:00.000Z

The waiting is almost over

the tree is trimmed

the parcels wrapped

Food preparations are underway.

For some, this Christmas Eve

brings a rush of activity

to get all the last minute tasks done.

For others, this Christmas Eve

brings a calm approach

as they quietly prepare

to welcome the Christ child again.

And for still others,

this Christmas Eve

brings a desperate struggle

just to survive another day.

Because it's Christmas...

means little to the homeless young woman

sheltering under the railway bridge

trying to keep her Christmas box wrappings dry

so that she can sleep under them another night.

Because it's Christmas...

has no impact

on the heroin addict

wandering the High Street

checking out "opportunities"

for his next fix.

Because it's Christmas...

brings no comfort to the young parent

trying to do the best for their children

while sick with worry

about their partner

off fighting in Afghanistan.

Because it's Christmas...

will not change a thing

unless we allow the baby God

to leave the swaddling behind

Unless we embody Christ

in our lives

and work to bring peace and hope and light

into all the darkness of today's world,

Because it's Christmas...

will not change a thing

unless we allow the God of Christmas

to be born in our hearts and lives

this day and every day

Because it's Christmas.

Liz Crumlish December 2011

Christmas crib

2011-12-23T23:35:00.000Z

During another excellent school Nativity presentation this morning, I had a moment's panic that the crib had been left behind. It hadn't and, at the right time, it was brought forward for Mary to lay down her baby.
That moment of panic, though, spoke to me of the season of Advent and all the preparation we've tried to build into our lives at home and in worship together. When the Christ child comes, nothing else matters - all that is important is swaddled in a manger - therein lies Christmas.

Christmas Eve Watchnight

2011-12-22T18:30:00.000Z

Call to worship

Come fresh from your revelry

or your loneliness

to find warmth and fellowship here

as we watch in the darkness

for the dawn of another Christmas

Know that you are welcome

just as you are

The baby who snuck into the stable

slips in here tonight

Can you see him?

Can you feel him?

Sense the beat of the wings of angels

brushing your cheek-

announcing to you this night

as they did 2000 years ago in Bethlehem

the good news

that God lives in love with us.

Liz Crumlish December 2011

Seasonal magic

2011-12-22T14:47:00.000Z

Four candles are now lit

in our advent ring

Just waiting for the Christ candle

to complete the circle

The longest night

has come and gone

we hurtle on

toward Christmas

When we get there

will it matter

if we've forgotten something?

Will our celebration

be diminished?

And when Christmas day is over

will things be any different?

Or will we simply breathe a sigh

and immediately begin

to whip ourselves up into a frenzy

to get to the end of the year?

Celebrating Christmas

whether well prepared

or weary

provides for us

amazing possibility.

One day in the year

cannot change the world.

But hearts prepared

to welcome

and embrace

the Son of God

and share that Christmas Spirit

will go a long way

to bringing magic

into the season

More waiting

2011-12-21T23:18:00.000Z

The sanctuary is quiet -

recovering from the onslaught

of one school service

getting ready for the next

taking a breather

before the story

is played out

all over again.

The same old story

told over and over

sometimes to new audiences

sometimes to familiar faces.

But the greatest story ever told

bears repeating

in every time and place

made new

for every generation.

God dwells among us.

Seasonal weariness

2011-12-20T22:54:00.001Z

Did they weary, those wise men?

Did their steps become slower,

their momentum more forced?

Did the novelty and the wonder

and the excitement

begin to wear thin?

Their journey was long

and drawn out.

It wasn't exuberant and spontaneous

like the shepherds.

Or full of glory

like the angels' song.

Perhaps that is one of the drawbacks

of a period of preparation -

the anticipation mellows,

worn down by the passage of time.

The destination ceases to attract,

lost as it is in the ordinary.

A quest for all of us

journeying through Advent:

to recover something of the vitality

of the beginning

so that this far on in our travels

we can be refreshed

and rekindled

by a glimpse of the goal.

And our weary steps

take on a sprinkling

that will provide the surge we need

to see it through.

Liz Crumlish December 2011

They followed the star

2011-12-19T23:01:00.000Z

Girvan Beach November 2011

The star carves out a path

lighting up the way for others

It beckons us to follow

in its wake

to tread the contours marked out

and those we can barely imagine

It lures us in

out of the shadows

banking on our curiosity

to keep us on the quest

for that sense of promise

and fulfillment

that can only be sated

by a love

that is out of this world.

Liz Crumlish December 2011

Nativity

2011-12-18T13:05:00.000Z

Tea towels that simply won’t stay,

tied on with dressing gown cords,

halos lopsided or sagging,

slipping down over eyes lit with mirth.

Crowns that are coming unstuck

as the tinfoil decides to unravel,

yet, together creating a scene

of such harmony and tranquillity

that it tugs at the heart strings

and reminds all who look on

of the chaos and the holiness

that unfolded so long ago

in a stable in Bethlehem,

when God was born

in a feeding trough.

Liz Crumlish December 2011

You expect me to believe that?

2011-12-17T21:13:00.000Z

Immaculate conception

virgin birth

angels and shepherds

bright shining stars

wise men and mangers

an angry king

a desperate world

and a baby God

Do you really expect folk

to believe all that?

What a story to tell a world

that longs for good news today.

The only way folk will believe

such a fanciful tale

is if they can see the evidence

that God is born

in us

if we can share the love

that came down at Christmas.

Incarnation

2011-12-16T21:02:00.002Z

Incarnation - God WITH us

not just an historic event

not just in a manger in Bethlehem

for, as momentous as that was

it is NOT enough

Not enough for a world

experiencing the darkness

that shrouds the world today

Not enough for a world experiencing

economic recession,

unemployment,

homelessness,

poverty,

insecurity,

corruption,

oppression,
injustice

hopelessness.

Not enough for a world

constantly needing to see

and to feel

God with us.

God with us

in ways that make sense

of the world today.

God with us

in ways that bring light

and hope into today's darkness.

God with us

as startling

and as transformative

and as unthinkable

as it was 2000 years ago.

God with us

kicking and screaming

and helpless and vulnerable.

Incarnation - for today.

Liz Crumlish December 2011

Irrational season

2011-12-15T22:40:00.000Z

This is the irrational season

When love blooms bright and wild.

Had Mary been filled with reason

There'd have been no room for the child.

Madeleine L'Engle

Believe...

2011-12-14T21:01:00.000Z

Believe in what your heart is saying
Hear the melody that's playing
There's no time to waste
There's so much to celebrate
Believe in what you feel inside
And give your dreams the wings to fly
you have everything you need
If you just believe

Glen Ballard and Alan Silvestri

Performed by Josh Groban, featured in The Polar Express

Choosing

2011-12-13T16:37:00.000Z

These past few weeks, schools have been disrupted by industrial action and by bad weather. Inconvenient for some. A bonus for others. Weekends tend to be work filled, so an opportunity midweek to enjoy some quality family time has been a gift.
Life bombards us with situations not of our choosing or making. How we see those and use them varies and is dependent on lots of other factors but, often, we have the chance turn a difficulty into something positive.
In the busyness of this season of Advent, we can choose to find time for contemplation, choose to swim against the tide that wants to sweep us headlong into Christmas and, instead, take time to appreciate the journey along the way.

O Come, O Come, Emmanuel

2011-12-12T20:53:00.000Z

It wasn't supposed to be a candle lit carol service. We hadn't done a comprehensive risk assessment. But, when there was a major area power failure about an hour before the service was due to start and, with the 80 strong community gospel choir, the brass ensemble, the worship band and the drama group already there rehearsing in a well heated sanctuary, we decided to dig out the candles and go ahead. And what a beautiful service. What a wonderful ambience. And the baby Jesus certainly showed up, right at home in the improvised setting, enjoying the spontaneity and as disappointed as the other worshippers when the lights eventually came back on!
In those one-off unplanned moments, God is at home, inviting us to lay down our carefully choreographed schemes to make room to celebrate the advent of God with us - Emmanuel.

Advent wishes

2011-12-11T20:31:00.001Z

This meditation is based on the four weeks of Advent

Christmas wishes ….

My wish for you this Christmas is hope

the hope that things can be different

that the odds can be reversed

that justice can prevail

that we can see God turning cartwheels right in front of our eyes?

Why?

Because God is continually trying to attract our attention

so that even in the darkness of life

we can see flickers of hope

My wish for you this Christmas is peace

not that wee moment of darkness when all is quiet and you can take a breath

but peace that is deep and lasting

that seeps in to everything you do

changing your perception

calming your fear

letting you relax as you have never done before

My wish for you this Christmas is love

the love that came in the form of a baby

born in poverty and seen as a threat

to political stability

that kind of love

not sentimental or slushy

but grounded in the reality of a harsh and brutal life

fighting for survival

succeeding against the odds

making all the difference

Love that perseveres because love is of God

My wish for you this Christmas is joy

joy that ripples right to your toes

not the easy smile you wear

or forced jollity you perform

but a joy that bubbles up from the depths

lifting your spirit

sending you soaring

leaving you reeling and breathless

the joy of the baby God

And with these gifts

of hope and peace and love and joy

God fills us to the brim

so that we can overflow

in to the world around us

being Christ to each other

Seeing Christ in each other

And serving even the least of these.

Liz Crumlish December 2011

And is it true...

2011-12-10T19:19:00.000Z

I love these words from John Betjeman:

And is it true,

This most tremendous tale of all,

Seen in a stained-glass window's hue,

A Baby in an ox's stall ?

The Maker of the stars and sea

Become a Child on earth for me ?

And is it true ? For if it is,

No loving fingers tying strings

Around those tissued fripperies,

The sweet and silly Christmas things,

Bath salts and inexpensive scent

And hideous tie so kindly meant,

No love that in a family dwells,

No carolling in frosty air,

Nor all the steeple-shaking bells

Can with this single Truth compare -

That God was man in Palestine

And lives today in Bread and Wine

Never ending story

2011-12-09T23:12:00.000Z

The Forth Bridge, which spawned the myth that, by the time its painters finished painting it, it was time to start again has, finally, been coated with a long lasting paint - which means it shouldn't need painted again for at least 20 years. It was unveiled today in all its painted glory. And so ends an era that produced a metaphor for those tasks that seem never ending.
Changing landscapes are a recurring theme in the life of faith. Continually, God's people are called to move physically and spiritually to embrace changes in the landscape and culture that surround us. Finding ways to keep the story alive and to share the steadfast love of God in a new age is the challenge always before us, a challenge to which we are called to respond with imagination and innovation that allows the old, old, story to be told in every age.
May advent hope and light pierce whatever landscape surrounds you.

Invisible halo

2011-12-08T12:51:00.001Z

Pregnant Advent

For those experiencing the anticipation of pregnancy

in this season of waiting and expectation

God sends angels

to massage soothing balm

into the twinges of fear and apprehension

For those mourning the emptiness of loss

in this season of giving

God sends angels

not to fill the void

but to hold the space

so that grief may be honoured and cherished

Those same angels that announced

earth shattering changes

in the lives of Mary and Joseph

and Elizabeth and Zechariah

and life altering good news

for shepherds going about their daily grind

minister in our world today

stealing into lives disrupted

by events

longed for or dreaded

bidden or unbidden

and wrap those invisible, noiseless wings

around our lives

mending and minding

swaddling in love

still being heralds

of the Advent of God

in ALL of life

Liz Crumlish Dec 2011

Love never ends

2011-12-07T21:38:00.000Z

We held our Quiet Christmas Service tonight, an opportunity for those missing loved ones, to sit out for a time from all the brightness of the season and to have their loss acknowledged and their sadness shared. Although this is only my fourth Christmas season in this community, I was very conscious of all those whose loss we have mourned even in that short time. As we hung stars on the tree and lit candles it was wonderful to feel so much a part of folks' lives, folk who have generously allowed me to share in their joy and in their sorrow.
The stars we hung on the tree reminded us of the birth we prepare to celebrate and the candles we placed on the cross linked that baby with the Christ who died for us. God gets alongside us in this season and in every season constantly reminding us that love never dies.

Perpetual star

2011-12-06T23:02:00.000Z

The star at the top of our tree is supposed to shine for 6 hours and then go dark, until the next night. But it has been shining since we set it in motion 3 days ago. It is battery operated and there is no switch so, other than removing the batteries, it continues to shine. How apt in the season when we celebrate the Light that came into the world which the darkness has never put out. (John 1)

Nativity chic

2011-12-05T23:04:00.000Z

Nativity sets come in all shapes and sizes. In our home, we have several - a beautiful Willow Tree set, a plaster set, made by disabled ex service personnel, a chunky plastic set (from Avon) that the children loved to play with, a playmobil Nativity and, this year's addition - a rubber duck nativity set. Perhaps not in the best taste, but lots of fun. Each in their own way portray the Christmas story, of love born in lowly places, for ordinary people - even those with a warped sense of humour!

Advent 2

2011-12-04T23:26:00.000Z

A reflection on John the Baptist - Preparer of the Way:

They flocked to see him, this wild prophet.

Out of curiosity?

Out of novelty?

Out of boredom?

He was certainly a sight to behold.

And he didn’t mince his words.

He told it straight.

Dressed nothing up.

Yet, still folk wanted to listen.

Maybe tired of being spoon fed

and molly-coddled.

They realised they needed to hear

something more challenging.

It wasn’t a message of comfort

but, in a strange way,

it was a message of hope.

And, somehow, the starkness

made it more real.

What if we stopped dressing up the story

and allowed the truth to emerge?

Being a messenger might involve

saying the things

that no one wants to hear

and showing a way

that no one wants to follow.

Shaking folk out of their complacency

to look toward the light.

Decentralising faith

2011-12-03T23:15:00.000Z

I've always wanted to see John the Baptist depicted in our church Nativity scenes. He'd be out of place to say the least. One of my colleagues suggested that we could put a motion activated John the Baptist in one of those outdoor Nativity scenes and, every time someone walked past he could call out something suitably insulting. That seems to be what John the Baptist was good at!
And yet, for all his harsh words, people flocked to the wilderness to hear him preach and to respond to his call to repentance.
John the Baptist conducted a ministry on the margins. And isn't that the sort of ministry in which the church today should be engaged - taking the good news out to the periphery of society, sharing with those on the fringes, to whom belongs the Kingdom of God.

The Gift

2011-12-02T18:16:00.002Z

Journeying through Advent

we look for perfection

for everything done and dusted

the i’s dotted and the t’s crossed

everything wrapped up and beautifully finished off

because it’s all in the presentation .

But you are so untidy, God.

You send a baby

who girns and soils,

needs fed and changed

who kicks off the covers and won’t lie still

and you ask us to care for this baby God

We can’t do that in our good clothes

in our pristine homes

because babies bring mess and chaos

and noise and upheaval.

They don’t fit into perfectly ordered lives.

God, give us the ability to tear up our schedules

and to give up our tidiness

and allow you, playful God

to muss our hair

and crumple our clothes

and, as we learn to care for you

may we also care for each other

in all our untidiness.

Liz Crumlish December 2011

Advent for beginners?

2011-12-01T18:32:00.000Z

I got to "explain" Advent to P7 kids today(11year olds). As always, this was a great exercise for making me think about what advent is. We talked about calendars, candles, and colours as well prophets, John the Baptist, Mary and Gaudete. Yes, we went quite deep! I was amazed when one youngster asked me - so what does the chocolate (in their advent calendars) have to do with Advent? I'll not tell you how I "fudged" an answer to that but it was a lovely opportunity to draw them back to the real point of Christmas - Jesus - who came to bring light, hope, peace and joy into the world.
To sum things up at the end, I used a video from Busted Halo and the children are going to go online and check out their Advent Calendar. Thanks be to God for children who encourage us to examine what we do.

Jesus on the Dublin bus

2011-11-30T22:26:00.000Z

On a clergy day out today the craic supplied by our Dublin bus driver was, as always, informative and hilarious.
At one point he said: "Being born in a stable does not make one a horse."
Of course he was unaware that he was transporting a group of ministers (we never admit to what we do on days out!). But his one-liner struck me as being particularly profound in this season of Advent.
The one we prepare to celebrate, born in a stable, was not a horse but the Prince of Peace.
A sacred moment and pause for thought on a Dublin bus!

Inconvenient

2011-11-29T23:00:00.000Z

Stormy weather is causing widespread flooding and travel chaos throughout Scotland this week. Cyberspace is filled with laments about plans disrupted and lives inconvenienced. The majority of us commenting on the bizarre disruption have warm homes to return to - or in which to remain. But what about those who have no such luxury, those for whom reaching over to switch on the kettle, make another cup of tea and wait out the storm is not an option?
Our faith calls us to be alert to the plight of others. to reach out and care "for the least of these".
But then, faith is pretty inconvenient too, is it not?

Not Redundant

2011-11-28T20:13:00.000Z

Waiting out the storm

until they are required

to be used as they were meant to be

Created for a purpose

and of little use

when not engaged

as intended.

Waiting for a season

In this season of Advent,

we wait too

unused as we are to delay

We wait

May the waiting refresh us

and enable us

to rediscover

our purpose

so that we can welcome

the one who comes to us

to be born in us

and to give us life.

Liz Crumlish Nov 2011

Chrismon

2011-11-27T20:58:00.000Z

This year, we're having a Chrismon tree in church - an evergreen tree adorned with white and gold Christ Monograms - all symbols of christian life and faith, and lit by white lights, symbols of Christ the light of the world.
Not only is it a lovely focus for our journey through Advent, it has also been a wonderful teaching tool for our youth church over the past few weeks as they learned the significance of the Chrismon tree and created decorations for it. They shared that teaching with the whole church this morning.
Advent is one of those rare seasons in the church when we allow the children to teach the adults. We try to see the story through the eyes of children. So very fitting as we prepare to welcome the Christ child.

Alzheimers is the pits!

2011-11-26T21:49:00.000Z

Enjoyed a brilliant concert this week by Glen Campbell, doing a farewell tour after his recent diagnosis of Alzheimers. He needed a fair bit of direction and keeping right and relied heavily on the auto cue but his voice and his playing were outstanding - what a talent. It is cruel that, daily, folks lives are affected by the rampant progression of such disease. It is also wonderful that so many sufferers refuse to lie down to it and fight it at every turn proving that diagnosis is not the last word but merely another step on a journey.

Out of season

2011-11-21T19:26:00.000Z

Perhaps a bit late in the season

these blackberries appear

some green, some just reddening

some ripe, ready to be picked

but it's almost Advent

and we're moving on

Instead of filling jam jars

or scrumptious pies

these berries will feed birds

or simply die on the tree

their season has come and gone.

And as we await with anticipation

the one who comes into the world

new born and full of hope

we are painfully reminded

that this promise of life

was out of season too

never allowed to ripen

but also left

to die on the tree

Such are the vagaries

of (human) nature.

Liz Crumlish November 2011

Wo-man up!

2011-11-17T22:27:00.000Z

Over the years I have experienced so much misappropriation of power in the church that I have come to associate power with abuse. This means that I shy away from leadership, having developed many negative connotations surrounding being in a position of leadership. Of course this is really challenging given what I do - lead a congregation. To date I have managed pretty well in my various appointments modeling a very collaborative style of ministry. And, while I would always assert that ministry is collaborative and that, as the whole people of God, we all share the responsibility, with God, for mission, there comes a time when people need clear leadership, leadership that maps out the path ahead and which offers protection from those who would jeopardise the journey.
The discomfort I might have felt in offering such leadership has however been offset by a very extensive and often intensive time of preparation, some conscious, some unconscious. I know I shouldn't really be surprised that this is the case, that the gifts I now need to embrace are to hand, having been carefully honed.
Stepping up and stepping out is not nearly so daunting when we can glimpse God ahead of us on the path. And, when that vision of God is of a playful God, hiding around the corner, ready to jump out and say "Gotcha!" it's time to abandon fear and pitch in with grace and humour. That playful God birls me around until I give in and, with a smile on my face and laughter in my heart, I embrace those tasks of leadership to which I am called.

Ending the year

2011-11-15T23:55:00.000Z

The local radio station, Westsound held its Hogmanay party tonight. It's being recorded and will be broadcast on 31st December. Those who attended will get to celebrate twice this year.
The church also does that - this Sunday marks the end of the liturgical year. We celebrate Christ the King Sunday. The lectionary reading is from Matthew's gospel - about sheep and goats and the notion that "as you did it for the least of these, you did it for me". It's a funny kind of king that we celebrate.
Next Sunday sees the start of Advent, a new year in the church when we move from Matthew's gospel to Mark's.
Sunday's reading is a good one to finish off the year - reminding us of how whatever we do for others has far reaching consequences. I believe that doing good can be contagious and, at the end of this, the church's year, my hope is that I can move into the new year infecting others with the gift of compassion.

Seeing beyond

2011-11-13T13:54:00.000Z

In spite of or more probably because of my views on war, I love putting together our annual Remembrance Service. It is challenging to hold together all the tensions that arise and attempt to make our collective remembrance worthy of all those who have borne the great cost of war and point to a future hope that we can find other ways to resolve conflict throughout the world. And, of course, year on year, as well as those who have died, we also want to affirm and support the growing number of casualties who are sentenced to a life bearing the physical and mental scars inflicted by their obedience in service as well as the many civilians who have also had their lives irrevocably changed - the "collateral damage" of government speak. Of course to do this effectively takes a huge amount of effort and this is generally appreciated. Sadly, there will always be those who are, quite simply, just too wrapped up in their own trivia to get even the briefest glimpse of a bigger picture. To catch that vision of hope that God affords, we have to lift our eyes and squint into the light.

Working with the stars

2011-11-07T23:34:00.000Z

Another great day of creativity with some of the Spill the Beans team, creating resources for Lent and Easter. It is energising when there are so many sparks flying - in a good way - and, although there is so much more work to be done, getting together serves to remind us of what we are about and how much fun it is to share. I hope those using the resources have as much fun as we have had putting them together. It makes all the midnight oil burning so worthwhile.

Revgals nostalgia

2011-11-04T23:22:00.000Z

This week, I've been looking back to the birth of this blog, at the kind of things I was posting 4 years ago, the discovery of revgalblogpals and the subsequent involvement with that supportive, online community. Tonight I shared that story with a group of church office bearers as an illustration of my journey as a woman in ministry. It has been a wonderful roller coaster of laughter and tears, joy and sorrow, isolation and embracing, fulfillment and frustration.
Above all, it has been a journey of discovery and of community. It has been good to look back this week and recognise growth and movement and, above all, experience a sense of loving and being loved. I look forward to further adventures on this voyage into the unknown, upheld by the love of God and the support of good friends - virtual and real.

All the saints

2011-11-01T01:04:00.000Z

The paper chain

is not a forgotten Christmas decoration

but a living reminder

of the family of God

past and present

visible and out of sight.

The saints who have gone before us

and those who still mentor us

in our everyday.

The colours speak of the vibrancy of their witness

and pay tribute to the vitality

of their influence on us

who seek to be saints

for our day.

Saints

not because of our goodness

or our giftedness

but saints

because God declares us so.

And so we fluff up our wings

and polish up our halos

and walk tall

in the power of God

forging ever more links

in that living chain.

Irreverent friends

2011-10-30T23:12:00.000Z

On a night out with some girly clergy friends, the talk turned to clerical attire - from sparkly dog collars to pink edged preaching gowns. Beware local presbyteries - services of ordination and induction are about to get much hotter in the robing up department!
So much for the sexless cassock.

Feeling the warmth

2011-10-29T12:44:00.000+01:00

Beth has just posted that it is snowing in the Mountains in Virginia where we spent part of the summer. Although the landscape must look very different now, I was immediately transported back in my mind, recalling happy thoughts such as: Walking barefoot the labyrinth mown in the grass and resting on the bench in the middle that calls out for one to rest awhile.
Lying on my back, quietly, with folk I love, gazing at the night sky, marveling that the same stars and constellations we see in Scotland are visible across the pond.
Making music with folk who just enjoy jamming and who share their talents humbly.
Experiencing community and fellowship in brief yet enriching encounters.
Knowing acceptance because I too love and serve God.
Appreciating the invitation to be involved fleetingly but affected for ever.
Summer is a time to create memories that will provide sustenance no matter how long or how harsh the winter that follows.

Liberation theology?

2011-10-26T17:13:00.000+01:00

I always feel that, when I preach, I convict and challenge and confront and encourage myself as much as, if not more than, anyone else. The preaching arises from the word of God speaking into my life and into the life we share in community together. In preaching this week, I quoted Oscar Romero:
"We accomplish in our lifetime only a tiny fraction of the magnificent enterprise that is God’s work... Nothing we do is complete, which is another way of saying that the kingdom always lies beyond us...We cannot do everything, and there is a sense of liberation in realizing that... This enables us to do something, and to do it very well. It may be incomplete, but it is a beginning, a step along the way, an opportunity for the Lord’s grace to enter and do the rest.”
This week, I want, desperately, to grow into that reality - of being liberated by the enormity of the task rather than burned out by it.
Perhaps if I spent some time sitting with the notion instead of trying to disprove it, perhaps if I accepted better my inability to achieve everything, perhaps if I made some room for God's grace instead of birling like a demented dervish so that the centrifugal force of my frenetic activity sweeps the space around me of everything that might assist the Kingdom of God, perhaps then, I might know liberation.
I certainly intend to continue to allow these words of wisdom to meander with me until I reach the point where it is me who meanders with them. Such a turnaround might just bring some true liberation and make room for God's grace to get to work - in my life and in the lives of those to whom I minister.

Dancing in the aisles

2011-10-23T16:05:00.000+01:00

The Rae Bros New Orleans Jazz Band led us wonderfully in worship this morning. And there WERE folk up dancing in worship.
The theme of the service was Moses' journey to the Promised Land. Clearly, the Promised Land will be full of jazz musicians!
If that kind of music can free folk from their Presbyterian inhibitions, as it did this morning, that can only be a good thing.
Thanks to the Ayr Jazz Festival for bringing the musicians to Ayr and allowing us to host them in worship..

Jazzing the gospel

2011-10-22T21:57:00.000+01:00

As part of the 7th Ayr Jazz Festival, our worship will be led tomorrow by the Rae Bros New Orleans Jazz Band. After church last Sunday, in the village of Collioure, we encountered this street band - a very colourful collection of musicians. I had great admiration for the conductor (a fairly diminutive woman) who managed to keep a seemingly unruly bunch in some sort of order. It was clear that these were folks loving what they did.
Hopefully, in our worship tomorrow, we will know some of that exuberance and improvisation as we submit to the orchestration of the divine conductor.

Surprising God app.

2011-10-10T17:06:00.000+01:00

I love all things Apple. The death of Steve Jobs last week has brought a flurry of tribute cartoon depictions - Of Steve arriving at the Pearly Gates and, seeing St Peter paging through a huge tome to find his name, suggesting: "I have an app for that". Or being introduced to Moses as the man who can update his tablets.
All this has me musing - Can we surprise God?
Is our Creator capable of being amazed by the inventiveness of human beings?
I'd like to think so.
Of course, the opposite is also true - God must cringe at the levels to which we stoop. I've never been much in doubt of that.
But that means that it must also be possible to amuse and intrigue and to gladden the heart of God.
And there should be an app for that!

Counting blessings

2011-10-04T22:45:00.000+01:00

Elder is a man happy at his work. Every time we encountered him he was chuckling. Whether serving dinner or demonstrating napkin folding or playing practical jokes, an encounter with Elder was always uplifting.
Elder came to mind tonight as I described my work to someone, expressing the joy and privilege it is to serve God full time. I was chatting with a man who is totally immersed in his church but who also has a "day job". I know that God calls us to serve wherever we work but I was struck by how blessed it is to have the luxury of full time kingdom service.
Hopefully I will remember that next time I have to deal with those difficult people who abound in every work place.

Unexpected bonus

2011-10-02T22:48:00.000+01:00

The unseasonal autumn weather has tricked some flowers into believing that it is spring and flowers are blooming that shouldn't be at this time of year. It has also led to a more intensely coloured autumn than usual.
With the assurance that plants will flourish again in the spring as usual, this bizzare phenomenon is surely a welcome bonus.
Enjoy!

Gifted

2011-09-29T22:24:00.000+01:00

I've just returned from a 24 hour consultation with the Ministries Council of the Church of Scotland which, unexpectedly, turned out to be a liberating and inspiring experience. Phil Hanlon, Professor of Public Health at Glasgow University who, among other things, leads the After Now project, led delegates in an examination of the perceived difficulties of ministry in contemporary Scottish culture. His easy yet incisive style and his attentive listening and gifted analysis were incredibly helpful in getting to the heart of what inhibits and depresses us as servants of an institution in chaos that seeks to serve a society in flux.
I'm sure everyone would take away something different to inform their own particular ministry. For me, that gift is the "permission" to recover a sense of vocation - focussing on those things to which I feel called and for which I feel gifted. That doesn't mean that I am not willing, from time to time, to be stretched and challenged to develop. But it does mean, perhaps, that I can live with the fact that I am not good at chairing committees or at producing detailed plans from the big picture dreams that I embrace. Fortunately there are others who have been gifted with those skills and I am more than happy to surrender to them those tasks that I find mind numbing and that sap the energy I might usefully invest elsewhere. Already I am feeling re-energised by that prospect!

A gift from God?

2011-09-27T18:17:00.000+01:00

Swan pond at Culzean

Today, I am being challenged by these words:

Our Greatest Gift from God

By Thomas Keating

On the spiritual journey, there is usually someone in our family, business or community whom we cannot endure, someone who has a genius for bringing out the worst in us. No matter what we do, we cannot seem to improve the relationship. They have not done anything to cause it. God simply uses them to reflect back to us what our problem is. Thus the person who gives us the most trouble may be our greatest gift from God.

Source: Invitation to love

D'you think?

Nostalgia

2011-09-24T23:16:00.000+01:00

We drove for a while this afternoon behind this old car along the coast. No idea what vintage it actually is but it has clearly been lovingly cared for. I couldn't believe how narrow the tires are. As we approached the village, the driver stuck her arm out of the window to indicate the direction she was turning. What a joy to drive out of sheer pleasure rather than the necessity to get from one place to another, usually in a hurry.
Tonight I am musing on whether driving something more sedate that requires TLC and nursing along might encourage slowing down and paying more attention to detail. Taking pleasure in the journey as well as the destination. Encountering God along the way.

Storm damage

2011-09-18T20:35:00.001+01:00

During the summer, this beach was simply warm, luxurious sand, often too warm to walk barefoot on. Today, it is covered in seaweed dredged from the depths of the sea bed. Storms have rendered it a very different landscape. Still beautiful and alluring but vastly different from its summer persona. The beach continues to be moulded and changed by external factors yet maintains its intrigue and strength of character. We will never know the half of all it has endured and withstood.
Like so many lives around us, ravaged by storms, the depths of which we will never fully know, yet maintaining an integrity and a strength that promises survival. May we always tread respectfully in awe of the changes wrought by the storms affecting those we encounter in our daily lives.

Rippling light

2011-09-08T09:49:00.000+01:00

Although we saw many cool things on holiday this year on a trip to Virginia and the Bahamas, my favourite discovery was lightning bugs - tiny creatures that flash phosphorescently in the dark. They were magical pinpricks of light that really lit up the atmosphere. It's amazing the difference such tiny bugs can make to the night air.
I've been thinking about those bugs a lot this week as I've spent time with lots of grieving young people who have lost a good friend. I'm impressed at the way they are sharing their grief lovingly and sensitively, bringing hope and comfort to their communities. They have devised their own very moving rituals for remembering and saying goodbye. They have also, in their hurt, been able to celebrate many good times and achievements. Like the friend they mourn, these young folk are making a huge difference to their communities, lighting up the darkness with their own brand of shining light. That light cannot help but penetrate the awful darkness into which they have been plunged.
The light shines in the darkness and the darkness has not overcome it. John 1:5

Enthusiasm in evangelism

2011-09-05T22:23:00.000+01:00

I recently bought some new skin care products. I knew what it was I wanted and where I wanted to buy it - with a voucher I had been gifted. But I was impressed with the sales person who assisted me. Even though it was obvious that I was already a "convert", convinced about the product I sought, she went out of her way to explain its many benefits. And she did so with a refreshing joy and passion. I left reassured about my choice and renewed in my love of the product.
If only we who claim to love Christ could be as convincing and passionate about our faith.

Community in communion

2011-09-04T13:27:00.000+01:00

Although I have only been here just over 3 years, I was very conscious, as we celebrated communion together this morning, of the sense of loving and being loved - not just God - but the community I've been called to serve.
As I looked around I could see familiar faces, folk whom I have grown to love and who have allowed me to be a part of their work and worship and living.
I could also see folk who challenge me to be even more loving, for that's what it takes.
And, as I noticed, too, those missing from our company, those who have gone on the be part of that great communion of saints, I was filled with compassion but also an awesome awareness of their presence sharing the sacrament that unites us in love - love that goes beyond death.
I am thankful to be part of a real community. The reality means that it is not always easy, it is not without conflict and challenge - for that is part of being in community - but reality also involves keeping on loving - in the easy times and in the difficult.
Today, there was real community in communion.

Communion for a community on the move

2011-09-03T22:52:00.000+01:00

Invitation

God calls us forward

on a journey

a journey whose destination is unknown

a journey that carries no earthly promise of reward

God calls us

whatever stage of life we are at

whatever state of faith we have

Here is food to sustain us on the journey

so, come to this banquet

in response to God’s call

And let us feast

at the table of God where ALL are welcome.

Prayer of thanksgiving and consecration

Take off your shoes, you are on holy ground

put on your sandals, it’s time to move

God, at different times, in different places,

what you require of us changes

but, wherever we are, whatever awaits us,

you provide us with what we need.

You equip us to respond

and sustain us as we journey,

Today we hear your call to us

to be a community on the move

to shake off our comfort and complacency

to follow you.

To follow you into the unknown

and to embark on a journey

that offers no assurances

and no security

but calls us to trust in you

to lead us forward.

As we gather here in community

sharing bread and wine

in memory of Christ

who left all that he knew

to become one of us

may we be inspired to follow his example.

You led the Israelites on a journey of a lifetime.

May we be excited about the journey you’re taking us on.

And may we know

that the food you supply

Christ’s body broken for us

Christ’s blood poured out for us

is sufficient to sustain us wherever you lead us.

May your spirit be present in this communion

and in our hearts as we share together.

Seasons of the parish

2011-08-31T21:19:00.001+01:00

For some time now, I've been conscious of a cyclical nature accompanying the tasks of the parish. Whilst there is always an element of unpredictability, things do tend to come along in seasons. Funerals, visiting, schools work, meetings, admin. I could become jaded, like the writer of Ecclesiastes, who declared: "What has been is what will be and what has been done is what will be done. There is nothing new under the sun." But the wonderful thing about ministry is that, constantly, ministers have the privilege of working with so many different people in a fascinating variety of roles and context. Pausing for a moment, as the church revs up again after the summer, to take stock of the open access afforded to parish ministers, is a sobering exercise accompanied by a tremendous sense of responsibility. A task only achievable when empowered and accompanied by the spirit of God, Ministry is certainly not a comfortable place for loners or for the weary or for those who don't like surprises. God leads us collaboratively into the most unlikely situations and infuses energy and, thankfully, lots of humour along the way.

Bird's eye view

2011-08-29T20:55:00.000+01:00

What do you see from your lofty perch

as you gaze with haughty disdain?

What is captured in your bird's eye view?

alert for the smallest grain

or crumb of comfort

carelessly dropped

by the ant like humans below

whose lives are a drudge

that they carry around

as the seasons come and go.

The rich pickings of summer

are swept into autumn

like leaves that are shriveled and dry

Yet still you keep watch

from your cloud covered throne

not yet ready to fly

from the drama unfolding

new every day

with connections not yet understood

and a tear forms at the corner

of your little bead eye

as you recall another who perched

with a view much like yours

and who wept at the sight

of the lost and the lonely and weary souls

with no hope in their hearts to bring light.

One who could see, as you're seeing now

that it's not the way it should be

if they'd only look up

all would be changed

by the love that sets prisoners free

and drab, weary lives

would be transformed by joy

and colour would steal through the gray

and the rainbow reflected

in the puddles of life

would herald the dawn of a new day.

Take time to play

2011-08-23T18:20:00.001+01:00

What struck me about this photo - apart from the obvious danger of planking on a railway line - albeit one used only by steam engines- was the fact that it's the adults who are playing while the children look on in bemusement. Adults don't often take time out to play. Responsibility and the pressures of time weigh us down and keep us from many things that might bring some relief and some balance into our lives.
Ask yourself: When was the last time you played?
How could you create time and space for a healthy balance of work and play in your life?
Then go do it.
BUT NEVER EVER PLAY ON THE RAILWAY LINE!!!

Picturing the word

2011-08-22T22:01:00.000+01:00

Had another wonderfully creative day with the spill the beans team today. There is lots of midnight oil to be burned in putting advent and epiphany to bed but what a wonderfully stimulating session of just looking at the word, seeing it and hearing it from so many angles and with so many nuances. Today I also became aware of something very obvious - there is no reason that we can't have that sort of tussle with the text with folk in our congregations on a regular basis. No preparation needed - just a willingness to let the text speak for itself!

Who do you say I am?

2011-08-21T14:27:00.000+01:00

There were lots of interesting answers to Jesus' question at church this morning.
Who do you say I am?:
My guide and my friend...
My everything...
My Lord and my God...
The one we aspire to emulate...
My Saviour...
Son of God...

What do you say?

Energy in distractions

2011-08-19T22:50:00.000+01:00

I've always maintained that parish ministry is sustained by work outside the parish. And this week has borne that out. Several meetings I've been involved in over the last few days have addressed issues affecting the wider church. Concentrating on these for a time helps give new perspective to the everyday tasks of serving this local community. And stimulating discussion with colleagues brings renewed energy and enthusiasm, an energy and enthusiasm that filters back into parish work. Serving the wider church does not diminish parish ministry but enriches it.

What now?

2011-08-11T20:08:00.000+01:00

I am conscious that, living in Scotland, unaffected personally, by rioting and looting in England, distance provides a degree of luxury. But I am dismayed at the angry and vengeful tone of a government who, let's face it, are also, on the whole, not personally affected - unless, of course, you count loss of votes and loss of confidence of constituents.
To think that plans were in place to use torture such as plastic bullets and water canons is horrific. And this without any plans to address the underlying issues that have undoubtedly escalated to boiling point, erupting in the violence we have witnessed this week.
If, as someone suggested, Scotland was unaffected because we have a different culture and a different perspective on community, shouldn't we try to identify the values on which these are based? However you want to brand rioters and looters, surely we desperately want to examine how we as a society have failed people to such a degree that they resort to such means of protest.
There were a number of Facebook discussions this week on the role of the church in contributing to the brokenness of society. Of course the church must always be prepared to examine its shortcomings. However addressing those shortcomings will not involve the church becoming more hard line and uncompromising (like our government seems to be set on). Responding to such a broken society requires love and acceptance and understanding and, above all, grace - supposedly the forte of the church.

Fire of the Spirit

2011-08-08T23:55:00.000+01:00

This morning, I had one of the most intense spiritual conversations I have had for some time - with one of the fire fighters who visited our Holiday Club. We talked of good and evil, of love and death, of angst and expression, of the dark side and edgy music, of the pursuit of happiness and inner contentment...
Conversations like that used to be more frequent when I served as a hospital chaplain but, now that I am a parish minister and, in many ways, more identified with the institutional church, it is, for some reason - probably many reasons - hard to get beyond the religious and denominational pleasantries.
This morning, it was good to be able to affirm once more that I am "right off religion" and not experience a shocked reaction.
A brief encounter - but a breath of fresh air. Thanks be to God.

Signs of the Kingdom

2011-07-24T15:30:00.000+01:00

Jesus, in the gospel, asks: What is the Kingdom like? And goes on telling stories to illustrate the Kingdom.
Looking around today, what stories point to the Kingdom?
Of course we would want to point out that the slayings in Norway, carried out by "a fundamental christian" are far from the Kingdom.
Pictures of drought stricken communities and war ravaged cities are not obvious signs either, though, in all of these stories, we find God at work despite human beings.
The question for us, though, is: To what stories do we contribute that point positively to the Kingdom of God existing in our midst?
How do we become signs of the Kingdom?

Wayside planking

2011-07-23T13:25:00.001+01:00

Two pastors planking on a wayside pulpit in McDowell, Virginia.

It reads: U R born 2 B a blessing 2 D world.

Amen to that!

Light up the darkness

2011-07-22T15:58:00.000+01:00

I've just discovered lightning bugs for the first time - magical little creatures that light up the darkness of a summer evening. As far as I know, we don't have these in Scotland. I'm giving thanks this week for these little harbingers of light - watching these while listening to the refrain of bull frogs and cicadas is truly wonderful. Celebrating creation with all the senses!

The old and the new?

2011-07-17T01:19:00.000+01:00

Planking on Girvan Bowling Green

I found it necessary at our annual church bowling outing to do some planking. It struck me that this was merging the new with the old - the ancient game of lawn bowling with the modern craze for planking. Ministry is a call to introduce new elements to ancient traditions. I wonder where Jesus would have "planked"?

Rock of ages

2011-07-08T22:12:00.000+01:00

In all the cracks and crevices

in all the gaps and hollows

the hand of God

is evident.

In the amazing complexity

and sheer wonder

of geology

we glimpse a brief theology:

the God of creation

assaults our senses

at every turn

with awesome sights

and sounds

so that we are compelled

to silence

in the face of

unspeakable beauty.

For everything...there is a season.

2011-07-06T22:06:00.000+01:00

I was sharing with a colleague recently how, so often, when the frustrations that are not the essence of ministry seem overwhelming, God allows us to encounter others at a deeply spiritual level, making a connection the like of which is one of the huge privileges of ministry. And, in such encounters, exhausting though they be, we are affirmed in our calling, in our worth and as beloved children of God. Such affirmation brings its own energy along with healing and restoration. Giving thanks today for that energy that allows us to rise above the life sapping hurdles that we meet along the way.

School's out!

2011-06-30T18:34:00.000+01:00

Even though it's another few weeks before I take a break, I always heave a huge sigh of relief as the end of each school term comes around. I am chaplain to 3 primary and 3 secondary schools, work that I love. But, at the end of each term, I too am excited and more than ready to take a break from that part of my work.
Today's end of term service was even more emotional than usual because the Head Teacher is retiring. It was wonderful to see so many former pupils of the primary school (who were obviously bunking off their last day in their secondary schools) come to bid her a fond farewell.
Paper aeroplane prayers finished the service off nicely but I'm sure I'll still be finding paper aeroplanes in unexpected places for some time to come.

Beyond words

2011-06-28T23:51:00.000+01:00

When we've finished

debating and deliberating

moderating and pontificating

God remains

When we've crossed every last T

and dotted every last i

God hangs on in there

And when we stop for a moment

and acknowledge that

we cannot control the world

God stuns us

with the beauty of creation

peeping out from behind clouds

romping over sand dunes

rippling on the water

and suddenly

perspective

shakes down

and slots into place

and we are besotted again

with the God of mystery

whose majesty

is all around

even when we're not looking

and whose wonder

saves us from ourselves

and all our plans

and lifts us up

to higher things.

Liz Crumlish June 2011

Moving on and letting go

2011-06-26T20:27:00.000+01:00

Not sure if this little chick survived the predators that abound in our garden but there was little we could do to change the course of nature. Just have to hope survival was the order of the day.
This week, the last week of the school term locally, involves harnessing similar hope for all our young folk as they move on, whether to another stage in the same school or on to new schools and colleges.
We release them, whether they know it or not, with hopes and dreams and, dare I say it, with lots of prayers for not just survival but for healthy growth. May all the preparation to date and all the nurturing serve them well in the next stage of their journey.
Looking forward to end of term festivities.

The longest day

2011-06-21T23:31:00.000+01:00

A very dreich Scottish day heralded mid summer. But there was nothing dreich about the pastoral encounters that filled the day. I never fail to be amazed at the contrasts experienced in the roller coaster of ministry and how the heaviest of days are tempered by light relief. Dedicating a memorial bench, sharing a cream sponge with an octogenerian, making hot chocolate for rowdy teenagers. It's all in a day's work, however long that day might be. No day is long enough, though, to celebrate the diversity of God.

Work in progress

2011-06-17T21:31:00.000+01:00

This rainbow was constructed in the sanctuary out of our hopes and dreams. It is good to have it as sign of hope and a reminder of what, in God, we might become as well as an assurance that we are loved just as we are. One of the most wonderful things about ministry is hearing people's stories and being reminded every day that each of us is unique and special. Our God moulds us and gifts us through every experience of life, through joys and difficulties. In God our hopes and dreams become realities.

Light touch belonging

2011-06-14T08:43:00.000+01:00

Light touch belonging, spinning yarns, reaching the 90 per cent, daring to risk, releasing dreams: Just some of the phrases buzzing around the Church of Scotland's Mission and Discipleship Council as we meet in Dundee. In fact there are so many creative sparks flying around that we set off the fire alarm and were forced out into the sunshine, awaiting the fire brigade. On resuming our meeting, however, there was no dampening down and, late into the evening we were still on an exciting voyage of discovery, sailing out of the harbour, not into the sunset but into choppy waters, risking the storm. None of us are unrealistic about the challenges facing the church as we seek to be involved in God's mission but neither are we running scared. We are assured that every once in a while God gives us a window of opportunity to catch up and join in building the kingdom. Looking forward to creating more havoc today and, in the chaos, discerning the hand of God proffering the kindling that will nurse these sparks to life, setting the church on fire to serve the world.

Broken for you...

2011-06-07T21:39:00.000+01:00

I had the privilege this weekend of celebrating communion in the two parishes I've been serving as interim moderator.
I celebrated in three different sanctuaries on Sunday but, in each, I was behind the communion table and it was left to elders to distribute the elements among the congregation. Today, however, in the intimacy of a sheltered housing complex in the parish, it was good to get "up close and personal" with folk as the sacrament was shared. Helping gnarled, arthritic fingers select a piece of bread. Assisting trembling hands to grasp a cup of wine. This felt like communion, honouring the whole church in heaven and on earth.

He left us to it

2011-06-02T18:46:00.000+01:00

He left them to it

and went back to the Father

Gave them the great commission

and then took off

as only Jesus could

took off

in a cloud of glory

leaving the disciples

wallowing in a cloud of confusion

and today

millennia on

it seems we're still

surrounded by clouds

covered in confusion

not sure of what's next

And so, once more

Christ commissions us

into all the world

make disciples

baptise

Father, Son and Holy Spirit

no contingency

you

and I

are it.

and make disciples.

We've been tagged.

The light shines on

2011-06-01T22:30:00.000+01:00

Still recovering from the effects of last week's General Assembly, I was feeling slightly weary tonight when I met with volunteers to plan this year's holiday club. But their enthusiasm soon rubbed off and I left feeling uplifted and looking forward to the plans for the week. More evidence that God uses leaders with feet of clay, accomplishing mission in spite of us.

A vintage tour

2011-05-27T21:37:00.000+01:00

This picture, taken in Edinburgh this morning, reminded me of that skit that Rikki Fulton used to do of the General Assembly of the Church of Scotland.
This year's Assembly certainly took a real tour of the Church of Scotland, tackling huge issues and taking decisions that will radically reform the church. There were many roundabouts and wrong turns and even a few dead ends. But the tour did finish and commissioners were dispatched to their various parishes to enact the decisions taken and to given further thought to unfinished business.
And, if it seems that all the talking and deliberating, the amendments and counter motions and the points of order make little real difference to the work we undertake in our communities. If it seems that the mission of God in the world, in which we are invited to participate, carries on regardless, then that is a good thing. Institutions must have processes and order. But none of these should hinder our sharing of God's love for the world. As the moderator reminded us in worship: gathered around tables, we should continue to tell the stories of faith and, in that faithful sharing, will communities be changed by the gospel of love.

Sacred cows and genius humour

2011-05-26T23:08:00.000+01:00

Today, at General Assembly, we spent hours debating whether the cattle population in Ayrshire rendered the area urban or rural when the simple admission that a mistake had been made would have saved everyone a lot of trouble. And then, surprise, surprise, we ran out of time to discuss Ordained Local Ministry, the proposed new non-stipendiary ministry.
Fortunately. the day ended with the Committee Anent Assembly Review, a light hearted look at events of the past week. Yet again Alec Shuttleworth and Robin Hill came up trumps. They are both so talented at poking fun at all the pomposity of the Assembly's business without being in any way cruel or derogatory. If only other commissioners would take themselves less seriously.

Where is hope to be found?

2011-05-25T17:08:00.000+01:00

It seems as though the shock of the debate and momentous decisions taken by the General Assembly on Monday are just settling in today - for me at least. As I entered the hall this morning, there were tense huddles of people and I experienced a melancholy settling in. That feeling did not improve as the morning wore on and then, in the afternoon, a report which would have entailed radical change was dismissed. Quite apart from the implications for the church as it chooses to remain in its present chaos, I could only imagine what the convenor who has lived and breathed the formation of this report for the last few years was going through.
The Church of Scotland seems a fickle place to be this week, signaling a huge shift one day and then resisting change two days later. I know that God is to be found in all of this, just not sure where at present. However, I do know that in that confusion I am in good company and follow in the footsteps of many who have through the ages been totally perplexed by the foibles of the church of Christ.
And I am also assured, in faith, that God holds out hope in all things.

Technology at the GA

2011-05-24T21:50:00.000+01:00

Although the entrance still looks as imposing as ever, with John Knox, (aka Dumbledore), looking menacing in the courtyard, the assembly hall has been extensively remodeled and fitted with all sorts of mod cons. Voting is done electronically as are requests to speak. The moderator and clerks are supplied in an instant with any information they might need via computer screens (albeit thanks to the efforts of a lot of skilled folk behind the scenes) and there is wonderful audio visual technology. I was reminiscing with a friend how, in the old days, to arrange to catch up with a friend for coffee during the assembly, it was necessary to leave a note in a commissioner's box. Nowadays, a mobile phone text message provokes an instant response and it is also possible to be socially networking whilst engaged in the business of the General Assembly.
In today's business, among other things, we were encouraged to consider renewable energy and to take a look at the ethics of the Internet. The Church and Society council's report was wide ranging, considering issues from the plight of Gypsies to the war in Afghanistan, from Homelessness in Scotland to securing the place of young folk in the church, from Mental Health issues to Domestic abuse.
The technology may be vastly different but the breadth and depth of issues under consideration does not diminish. The wonders of technology increases our awareness of the scale of local and global issues but the way forward in all these matters is entirely in the hands of flawed human beings. May God help us all to make a difference.

Identity Crisis

2011-05-23T22:40:00.000+01:00

We all now know who the premier division footballer was who sought an injunction to prevent his identity being revealed in affair allegations - thanks to Twitter - and the House of Commons. A review of privacy laws and regulation of social networking is being mooted.
However, this weekend, at the General Assembly, I've had so much fun talking to folk I've never met, yet feel I know intimately through the wonders of Facebook!
And, earlier this year, I was able to meet up with some wonderful women bloggers in America, whose stories I've been party to and whose journeys I've shared through the wonders of the internet community.
It can be truly transformative to discover that our journey is shared by caring pilgrims with whom we have yet to meet.
May we continue to hold the Christ light for each other as we travel on in our social networking pathways.

Roll Away the Stone

2011-05-22T22:44:00.000+01:00

A wonderful act of witness and worship was created today in the midst of the Church of Scotland's General Assembly. The beautiful setting of Princes Street Gardens, overlooked by the castle played host to many types of music, laughter, food, fun and fellowship. There was even a moment of quiet in the hubbub.
I couldn't help wondering - Is this the calm before the storm? Tomorrow we move on to debate thorny issues. Will the breadth and togetherness of the church displayed today be quickly forgotten as boundary lines are drawn? Or will we remember that the one who rolled away the stone breaks down every barrier and accepts us all as beloved children of God?
Praying, tonight, for peace and unity.

A paradox

2011-05-20T00:18:00.001+01:00

Often, as we plough our lonely furrow, the "big picture" becomes more and more remote. And, as someone who functions best when my imagination is being fired by the outlines and horizons of that big picture, I need regular affirmation and stimulation outwith the confines of day to day routine. These past few days, involved in facilitating training, my reserves have been topped up for a time. Although I am exhausted, I am, at the same time, energised. And, although thankful to be home and back with loved ones, I miss the company of those with whom I travelled these last few days.
How can exhaustion be at the same time exhilirating?
And how does a longing for the familiar co-exist with the need to be involved in something new and different.
How often it appears that creativity is dredged from the depths of tiredness and so the cycle continues. Sustenance is found in unexpected places and moments but is welcome nonetheless.

From funerals to weddings

2011-05-18T23:39:00.000+01:00

Today, the chat between sessions moved on from funerals to weddings - and the latest gimmicks. Many ministers become quite jaded by weddings, sacred though they are. But, often, the sacredness is overshadowed by all the trappings. In so much of life we lose sight of what is important in the distractions that crowd in and overwhelm us. De-cluttering is a good and helpful exercise in lots of areas of life.

The sublime and the ridiculous

2011-05-17T23:48:00.000+01:00

When a bunch of ministers get together, it is seldom very long before funeral stories are being exchanged. Some of the most bizarre incidents happen at funerals, and some of our most profound pastoral encounters happen then too. I am reminded of the words of Kahlil Gibran: Your joy is your sorrow unmasked and the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
In today's society it is an even bigger deal than it has ever been to be invited to travel alongside folk and accompany them in rites of passage, an invitation that we never take for granted and that, even in the most unconventional settings, we attempt to infuse with dignity and with respect, sharing the love of God with all God's people as we were commissioned so to do by the Risen Christ.